The way that you view the world is your reality and always wanting for something that you don’t have can be a very dangerous and destructive pattern to get into. When you are having problems or wish that you could instantly be transported to somewhere else where you would have more money, a different job, a more exciting lifestyle, or a better family, could have a deeper meaning.
This could mean that the source of your discontent and that you would be similarly unhappy in any situation given enough time.
The good news is that just by adjusting your expectations and the way that you interact with the world you can change your situation quite drastically. Instead of wasting all of the energy trying to figure out a way to argue better or stewing over the interaction that you had with your partner this morning, be grateful and use that energy to do something that you enjoy.
For example, my friend was unhappy with a lack of high school diploma, so he researched all the options and got a GED diploma instead.
The amazing thing about happiness is that it is very subjective and once your basic needs are met it’s all mental. So what’s the big deal?
Fear of Failure
If you have ever thought about starting a business or moving across the globe to do something that you were really passionate about and then didn’t because you thought about what other people would think you were grasped by the fear of failure. This may also happen when you’re buying a new home…fear is all around us so you must really try to deal with it!
The fear of failure can be a motivating factor to stay complacent, but what would it really be like if you did what you’ve always wanted and it didn’t work out. People tend to stay put because they associate failure with the end of the world instead of a learning opportunity.
The most awful thing that you can do is let this fear prevent you from trying something that you really want to do, like spending your free time outdoors or where you like to be,
The pressure to conform to what we think other people’s perceptions are of us and not test the failures is a product of our minds inventing a story out of fear. Instead of suffering the potential failure or gaining the potential success our fear keeps us paralyzed. Taking small steps in the direction of your goal and conquering small fears will build momentum to tackle even larger goals.
Risk is Your Friend
Are you afraid of taking a risk? As a function of our evolution, we tend to overestimate the dangers and risks associated with trying something new. As society teaches us to avoid risk at all costs we lose the ability to overcome the fear and venture into the unknown.
Stepping out on the ledge and going for something that you want will usually not be life-threatening and whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, as the old adage goes.
Learning to embrace risk won’t keep you from failing (this is what I really learned in a webinar) but it will keep you from regretting the inaction later on. Most people say that inaction is of a bigger consequence than the biggest failure that was caused by an action. Be afraid, but take action and time will heal any bruises that you get along the way.